conversation with blog.
Thursday, June 08, 2006
i have no one to talk to now, so i shall talk to u, blog.i'm not sure how i am feeling right now. did a little a maths, going to do phy later. still up to schedule.
i had been thinking again. and i'm not sure what kind of a person i am. i am that kinda person who ppl detests or that kinda person who wouldn make a difference even i'm not around?
i wish i were a better person. a better fren. i'm afraid of losing ppl around me, esp my friends. cos they make up my life. yet, i don't know how to cherish them. i make silly mistakes. but deep down, i really love each and every one of my friends and wish that the day when we part will not come.
i guess it all boils down to my depression. it spoils things. it makes me hate myself even more. it takes away all my happiness that many of my good friends have given me. i have fantastic memories to speak of, yet, they cannot surface. i feel as if i have let down my frens.
i wondder if its all my fault. i'm sick of putting the blame on myself all the time. i need to get on with life, do the things i want and have to do, and...enjoy. cos i have fantastic ppl around me. really.
so what the hell is stopping me from being a happy, optimistic person? who the hell has the right to take away what i shld be experiencing?
NO ONE. NO ONE AT ALL.
yeah. feel better now. back to word. thanks blog.