end of pw, end of sorrows.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
and so, pw is finally over.i will not say that i did not enjoy the process; my st has made it quite fun for my group actually. all the time spent together with my group was, well, quite fun.
i won't elaborate on how my group and i fared, but of course i hope everyone gets an A.
not in the mood to blog...
missing someone isn't a good experience, especially when that someone is a good friend.
Inspiration?
Sunday, October 21, 2007
i'm not sure whether this will stay, but at least i've sorted out my thoughts, period.ytd i was watching this chinese talk show, and this 82 year old woman inspired me greatly. she said (in mandrin) that we should not bow to any difficulties, but should allow these to increase your intelligence and your ability to better manouevre your own life.
how true is that.
i'm quite certain that my psychological prob will not be solved, at least for now. but i think that if i can contain it well enough such that it doesn't affect my daily life, it should be fine.
i must admit that i was previously angry for the lack of concern from my friends, but i guess striking a balance is important. to be frank, you can't expect your friends to care for you all the time. they have their own lifes to lead as well. and all along i don't want to be a hindrance to them.
and people, you really have to depend on yourself. not others. that's what i learnt.
as for lack of motivation to study...i suppose it will come back. if it doesn't...later only then say.
had dinner with jor and hz just now.
and i still said i don't want anyth to do with hz. i just cant bring myself to do that, can i?
indeed, everyone has their flaws. in order to be a true friend, you have to try to accept another's flaws, and try to improve them, if possible.
although he said things that hurt me, i realised i never took them to heart. it applies to those who hurt or teased me. to me, there really isn't a need to bear grudges, especially long lasting ones. its more tiring to hate a person than to befriend him.
having said that, there're some things which will leave a scar and will probably stay there for as long as i can remember. so i guess i won't help him anymore.
back to the dinner.
was quite a great one, chatted with them. haven't met jor since before promos, really hope he's doing fine. hz kept encouraging him to study, which he really should. i guess i will try to help him, if i can spare the time.
my true self is still there....
a leopard never changes its spots.
Scorpio Men
Saturday, October 20, 2007
The english isn't very good, but it's pretty accurate...A Scorpio Man
A man with a foggy clouds over him. He is sensitive and easily hurt and always feels lonely. He does not trust anyone but himself. Sounding so negative, but he has an amazingly charisma. He is a compassionate man. He absorbs other people sentimental feeling and pain.
He is a good psychiatrist and he could understand complex and confused feeling.
He has a hidden power that he could use it to make things happen and do things well. He does not like people who never try to help themselves before asking other people for favors.
He is the type of guy who mostly achieved his goal in life. Once he sets his mind for something, he will put all his energy and efforts in it, whether or not it is a small matter or a big project.
One of the most successful men in the entire Zodiac he is. He is a very patient man and can waits for years to reach his goal. He hates thin feeling and weak determinations. He can not retreat or rest for long, for he thinks life has more questions and more answer to be searched. If he is in love, you will get plenty of love from him, sometimes may be too much than you have asked for.
He is serious about love and relationship and will not waste time with someone he does not love whether how pretty she is. He hardly makes mistake. He could tell if you have any bad thought, and will not hesitate to tell you so. If you do not like straight forward sincere man, then pack your bag now. If you are an over sensitive person, try not to ask for his comments.
He will tell you the truth; even you might not be able to take it. Example, if you ask him if you are fat (and you are fat), he will say “yes, as big as a balloon”. He makes such comments because he cares for you, so do something about your weight and do not get up set with him. If he says “you look pretty today”, you can be proud because he will not say such think just to please you if he does not really mean it.
There will be both kind of people, those who like him and those who hate him. If you are in love this guy, be strong and belief in your decision, do not be vulnerable. He remembers all his anger and will wait or his pay back time. He is very serious about your promise; do not promise something you could not keep. He loves his friends and will do anything for his close friends. He likes you to take care of him, but not in front of his friend.
He is a complex man and you will never understand what he means if you do not really know him. He is happy to know he is a complex figure. When he is thinking or when he needs his privacy, you should give him some space. He memorize everything well. You may say something that you already forgotten, but he will remember every words. He wants to be respected and admired and at the same time he does not like people to have power over him.
When he falls in love, he really falls deep. A man in this Zodiac once in love, he will be sweeter than sugar. He does not like a plain and simple woman. A complex woman’s mind is his venture. Always be interesting and able to talk to him about everything in any subjects.
He does not like a woman who sits around waiting for his call.
anw thanks to hw for correcting me, edited the previous post a little...
PW.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
read eng yian's most recent post on pw.i've to say, i agree with most of his points.
indeed, pw started off as a pretty good concept, but then...MOE just screwed it up.
i've been nice and haven't ranted much about pw, but really, i feel that it sucks.
in my opinion, u cannot compare jc and poly students. Poly students' curriculum are very project based, hence resulting in them being able to work in groups better. while jc students have projects as well, they are still more focused on exams. so u cant blame them for not being able to work in groups well. at least that's for most students. judging from what i hear from lye ee, poly life is really much different from jc life. So there really isn't a valid basis of comparison.
it's going to be over in 2 weeks time, so i guess i just have to bear with it...
and my sch's way of distributing resutls...it's just illogical. to think SOME tutors think that it is logical and makes COMPLETE sense. i really cannot imagine what chaos there will be on Monday, when they release results in the LT.
i don't see why the management has to take soo long to decide on the retainee list.
in the past, at least in the case of my sec sch, all results are keyed in by the respective subject teachers after the marking is done. the papers are then released almost immediately for checking in the hall by class, and teachers will also go through the papers. Any last changes of the marks are made, and students are made to sign against our final scores for verification as soon as the list is done. in the case of the graduating class, level meeting will be held and teachers will then deliberate about moderation of results (and in sec 3, retention, but this isn't a big prob then). the whole process takes about a week or so. this may not the perfect way, but at least it makes sense.
in my jc, it has been...at least 2 weeks since promos are over, and yet results aren't released. they claim that they are now finalizing the retainee list (before we students know our results)...it's just weird. i know retaining students is a big thing, but why can't we get to know our results first? i don't see why other jcs can do this but not mine.
at least some tutors aren't happy with this...not like my ct...
well. expect chaos on monday.
sidetracking abit...my personal life is in a complete mess.
family prob, personal prob...relationship prob...
sigh.
when will things take a turn for the better?
when will i recover?
time will heal everything, they say. let's hope this is the case.
who am i?
Sunday, October 14, 2007
i'm kinda stuck in between my true self and my current 'rebellious' self. just hours ago i was helping marcus with some chem stuff, when i have a proposal to do, and till now its still untouched. (don need to sleep tonight alr...)apparently he's missing his friends here bcos he was reminded of his S21 on saturday. well, that has always been the case, hasn't it?
that aside, i really wonder if i should continue helping people. helping marcus is fine, at least he's the only whom i get to talk on a regular basis. and i feel better everytime i speak to him.
but the rest?
i really wonder...
suddenly i have the urge to tell the 2 of them how i really feel, how upset i am. but there will be repercussions which i have and don't want to face.
self-expression indeed.
i know you don't read my blog, but don give up!!!
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
i'm no christian, but after reading this (from one of the links), i really hope that i can achieve this...but whether or not its possible, that's another thing."I believe in Grace. If our paths cross, and give the oppotunity, I will make an attempt to make a positive difference in someone's life. But I will not go out of my way to do so. And that is what you are doing. I will only share once. If the person doesn't want to listen, then so be it. We can still go out and have a drink and some laughs."
does the world lack love?
nothing seems to interest me nowadays. nothing is painful enough to evoke a sense of concern. children being raped and beaten in africa, the rising poverty in myanmar...i really don't feel anything to these unacceptable events.to think i was one who sympathized deeply with those less fortunate. to think i was one who wanted to commit my whole life serving the community.
i'm breaking apart of this world. i really am.
i am well aware i shouldn't be thinking this way. chances that i am wrong are really high. but this is what i think, and before any comments start to grow and spurt and whatever, i can't control my thoughts anymore.
when i really really need help, no one is there. why else should i continue to help and serve people, which was what i had tried so hard to do in the past?
sorry guys. my condition is that bad.
back to work.
遗憾
遗憾今年的八月十五, 我没有看到月亮.
_____________________________________________________________________
人生充满了许许多多遗憾. 好不容易决定去做一件事, 可是不久后发现这么做不是自己想要的...那种感觉,那种被遗憾纠缠的感觉, 真的不好受.
算了吧.
some great links.
Friday, October 05, 2007
well, i came across these links at eng yian's blog, so i thought i would link them too, for easy personal reference as well. I'm sure he wouldn't mind.they are definitely worth a read; i've been to some of them myself...
and if u are interested in politics or current affairs, head over to eng yian's blog for a great insight.
signing off.
promos over.
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
well well, promos are finally over. i guess i must be one of the latest to post after then end of this big thing, but i seriously can't be bothered.promos, to me, is just a process which all jc students have to go through. i'm not talking big or anything, but its just like any other exam. The results that you get in the end only depends on 2 things - the amount of hard work you put in and the luck on that day of the exam. So there's no need to predict or guess your results, fate has already decided it.
And whether u can promote, the same thing applies - fate has already decided it for you.
That's all i shall say about promos...the next 'big thing' will be of course, pw.
Sucky as ever, the sch is already chasing us over it, and there are some groups who even met after the end of the last paper. Are they hyper workalcoholics or what?
I guess there are things which i don't agree with, and i must say no one can stop me from not agreeing with them. Its my personal opinion after all.
As for now, its some chilling out, relaxing and playing (GETTING A LIFE i mean) before starting (to finish) pw.
yep. get a life.