H3 SRP: A success?
Friday, February 29, 2008
I had my H3 Science Researh Programme (SRP) Oral Defence, and I think I totally screwed it up. :(On my way home, I thought about the many questions that I was posed with during the Q&A, and who exactly should be responisble for this flop. I won't deny that probably I didn't put in as much effort as I should (it's not as if putting in effort would really help, you will understand why later), but there are really many reasons behind it.
you see, on the outside, the Singapore education system seems good, or maybe even perfect. It gives you the opportunity to go to most good universities. However, what people are not aware of is that the system in Singapore is a spoon-feeding one. ie students go to class, teachers feed them with lots n lots of theory and concepts and homework and solutions, students simply suck them all up like a sponge and empty them during exams.
even in my school (shall be termed as the school from now), much as the phy tutors try to ask for input from students by asking them to present their answers, you can still feel the high reluctance among students to do so. the point is, you cant change a 10-year habit overnight.
this problem in amplified when it comes to research. research is something which requires alot of self-discipline. alot of things you have to find out on your own; nobody is going to tell you what to do. And the problem comes when Singaporean students being completely lost when they are given a project that is alien.
Lucky them if their research and teacher mentors tell them what to do. But I'm not as lucky. Nobody told me that I should read and understand basic organic reactions, nobody told me exactly why a particular compound was used (although I did ask), nobody told me what are the correct steps when it comes to doing research, nobody told me knowing the name of N=C is important.
which explains why I screwed up mine so badly.
of course, there are other internal reasons from my research institute, of which i don't want to mention here. (hey, its government owned.)
there are also limitations in H3 SRP as well. Most students I believe are not well trained in research. More often than not, they follow their mentors' instructions without knowing why. Those who are more active (ie those who ask) may not get the correct answer from their mentors cos they tend to keep things to themselves. (I even got a wrong explanation. the examiner had to correct me.) Teacher mentors are often too busy to guide you along, and so most of the time you are on your own.
think about it. you are doing something more chim than any other H3. how could you possible survive on your own??
SIGH.
that aside, I realise people in the school have a trend of threatening ppl. Someone threatened not to give my ct rep leadership points when he didn't put up some posters; someone else threatened not to write good testimonials if we weren't serious in our cip.
what infuriates me is that the first one is done SIMPLY because there is some MOE officials coming down for a check. why do all this for show? if you're good, you're good. no need for a facade.
and i guess my ct rep is right. his testimonial is pretty screwed, given his relationship with the ct. like me, he's a 6 pointer, and i think we have a very good reason to regret coming to the school. we could have gone somewhere else and receive better teachers (i hope), lectures and tutorials (i hope too) and easier recommendation for overseas univ. i don't know what -ism you call that, but apparently the school chooses who they want to recommend. and they threaten people with that too. =.=
wells...enough said.
i'm still as crazy over as L as I was yesterday.
definitely going to buy the DVD. :)
L: Change the World.
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Tomorrow is my H3 Oral Defence, yet I watched L: Change the World just now. :P
it's a great movie, really. worth the catch.
sometimes, it's good take a break when you're feeling stressed.
like what i've just did.
No matter how gifted, you cannot change the world
but that is also the most wonderful thing on Earth.
random.
Monday, February 25, 2008
i did sth funny today...i don't understand what made me do that. well i do funny things often don't I? So i guess that should be part of my weird life. haha.it's not exactly a bad thing to follow your instincts. in fact it's a good guide if you're feeling lost.
like what i always tell my friends, always follow your heart and instincts.
move on with life. =)
NJC: Going 6 years?
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Well, read eng yian's blog. i really cannot agree with him more.
previously, i didn't really care about NJC going 6 years; I won't be in that school any more next year. But after reading his post, I realise how many problems going 6 years will result in. Further straining of facilities...etc.
And many people got pretty insulted by what the principal had to say about having 3 different intakes (I better not mention it here, lest I get into trouble).
We shall see how this programme will work out. Time will tell.
And I was a happy boy yesterday. And probably going to be one today too. :)
Simple things in life can really make one happy. A simple 'thank you', a simple chat with a friend...
It's the sincerity that counts.
Stay happy guys!!! :)
post number 2
Saturday, February 23, 2008
fancy posting twice a day...while just happy that i don't need to deal with strangers....everything is settled.i also thought that the previous post was slightly gay, so this one is an attempt to bury it. not as if it would work anyway...
well, i had a very good nap...how I wish everyday could be like that....sufficient sleep.
oh ya. inflation has really caught up with everything. including dental services. imagine paying 200 bucks just to get a tooth plucked out.
those people who want to earn big money, you can consider being a dentist.
ok i really don't know what else to say...so till then.
hell is over
i realised i haven't blogged for quite some time. mainly because i had all sorts of crap to clear from mon to wed, and was slacking on thurs. friday...was meant for sth else. lol.i just read someone's blog, and i'm starting to wonder what exactly 'class spirit' is. simply being guai lan? hmm. well, sometimes i wish i could join that class, but now my position is like...having to deal with that class more. I hope not la, but if there's a need it's not up to me to decide. and poor me, will be gl-ed by tt class. haix. all your fault la, ask me do this kinda thing. like wat ms tay said, you should pay me 500 bucks for admin fee. lol.
somehow tt class always 'attracted' me, I donno why. but i know i'm never as guai lan as they are la, so I can forget about all those kind of funny thoughts i had in my dream.
but i really wonder why I'm the one doing all this crap, and not them.
whatever la. not important. what matters most that the matter is settled. yeah.
ah well. I have tons of things to do this weekend. and I mean tons. I wonder if I can ever finish them, given H3 Oral Defence is next Fri.
good luck to me. and stop slacking!!! lol.
ganbatte.
Fateful Day
Friday, February 15, 2008
Today wasn't a good day to start with.Boarded the bus without realising i brought an empty wallet; got chased down shortly after. went home to take the damned wallet of mine, and ended up having to take a taxi to school, which costed me 15bucks.
after school had lunch with justin, then listened to the Budget till I dozed off.
headed back to school for H3, then rushed down for dinner with jordan. (i wonder when i can meet him again....)
which reminded me of alot of things.
actually, I have been thinking alot about what happened the past week. you see, my class had a conflict with my ct, and it made me think whether there is such thing as 'correct' or 'wrong' in this world.
apparently, there's no such thing. a person can never be 100% correct, neither can he be 100% wrong. there always exist the grey area; people can be right at certain issues but wrong at others.
with regards to my ct, i think that he's right that consistent work is important. however, i do not think its fair to judge people within such a short period of time, and want people to conform to his standards. i'm sorry, but there exist no perfection in this world. excuses or reasons, it just doesn't exist.
most importantly, work hard, enjoy life and do not regret your decisions.
i also thought of what happened the previous week. i guess i may be wrong in the method of handling certain things, but still...i just want to say i don't want things to be this way. And jordan reminded me, I lost a friend.
Unlike the past, there's no turning back.
Whether or not is it my fault doesn't matter anymore. If it is really my fault, I will be responsible for it. But now, all I can see is that if that is how they want to think of me as a person, there's nothing I can do about it. I can't control others' thoughts.
So, it's time to move on with life. Cherish the memories, live the present to the fullest, and let the future come to you naturally.
最长的电影
Thursday, February 14, 2008
最长的电影
我们的开始
是很长的电影
放映了三年
我票都还留着
冰上的芭蕾
脑海中还在旋转
望着你慢慢忘记你
朦胧的时间
我们溜了多远
冰刀划的
圈起了谁改变
如果再重来
会不会稍嫌狼狈
爱是不是不开口才珍贵
再给我两分钟
让我把记忆结成冰
别融化了眼泪
你妆都花了
要我怎么记得
记得你叫我忘了吧
记得你叫我忘了吧
你说你会哭
不是因为在乎
MAHJONG.
Saturday, February 09, 2008
I just had a mahjong marathon...yesterday played 2 rounds with my family, today 3 rounds with jordan wilson and anita...cool huh?
it was still so noisy moments ago...now i feel so alone...so quiet.
you see, i don't get to see my friends often. especially wilson, who's like forever so busy. and he's a great friend...
well, that's what happens when everyone gets too busy. no time to meet, no time to relax.
wonder when's the next time we will get to play mahjong again...
I miss those days when we meet each other everyday and poke fun at each other...
anyways, thanks for today. u guys rock.
HAPPY CNY!!!
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Happy CNY everyone!!!okok, i know i'm like 1 day late.....
or did I wish everyone an advanced one earlier on?
(not like many ppl read my blog...)
well this year's cny is exceptionally sian, stoned the entire day at my granny's place.
and i realised how is it like not to know how to let go, despite many people telling you to do so.
i've let go of virtually everyone (yeah including HIM), except for the guy thousand of miles away.
haha...how silly.
suddenly all the disappointment and anger I felt days ago vanished...i tried 'looking' for them but didn't succeed...all the better. i'm calm and composed, ready to move on.
naggy as i am, i really have to thank this particular junior for being such a great friend during this choppy time...lol.
and now...the final thing before I can really be without worries (of the heart of course)...
HAPPY CNY!!!
CNY
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
well i'm back for a brief post...have been feeling unwell since last thurs bcos of the stupid rain, and just came back from the doc's...another 20bucks gone like tt.
SIGH.
another reason for me to sigh...some misunderstanding cracked and became a quarrel recently. i don't want (n i don think i can) to mention it here. but...i shall clarify myself here, once and for all...i really don't want things to be this way. ah well...
i guess now i'm perceived to be siding my cca and anti HIM. probably it's the way i handled the matter, and i admit i sucked at it, but here's how i really feel. if he wants to have a good 'legacy' behind him, or at least leave a GOOD impression behind this cca that he once was, then he should at least appear more responsible. I NEVER once said that he was wrong; I simply said that he could handle it in such a way that makes him APPEAR more responsible. in fact i felt that the cca had to be responsible too. if i wasn't concerned i wouldn have even bothered. But do anyone think about the way I think and feel? NO. the reason why i looked for her is because i felt that there is a way to resolve this amicably. it's all for him. and goodness, i'm not ANTI him. yet what do they think of me now? HYPOCRITE. BACKSTABBER. thanks very much.
and so...sth that my good friend said...very true indeed.
"...the world is filled with billions of people. Even Singapore is filled with at least 4 million potential headshots....LOL.... Having a friend is not so simple. Imagine the probability of you making friends with a person, and the probability you guys will be close friends. So there you go. Friends are important, cherish them. Close friends are people who changed your life, protect them. All the nice things will come to an end one day. Treasure the time together. However, not everybody can be your friend. If you know that someone cannot make it anymore, just give it up, do not waste your own time. There are others waiting for you to be cared for. Do not be short sighted and look only at whats in front of you. Rather, look at those who are around you all the while. Make the right choice. Regret, is one of the worst feelings in life. The past has passed. Its the future that is important. Reflect about your past, live for the present, look to the future. " Just being alive is such a lovely and wonderful thing."-Aya Kito"
ah well.
let things be dude, let things be...
and happy chinese new year to all! although it really doesn't feel like it. -.-
如果你是我， 你会怎么做？