a mistake?
Thursday, April 07, 2011
had an unhappy incident in school recently. I'm still very affected by it actually.
what happened was I decided to give this particular experienced teacher feedback that the class has given me. this isn't the first time I'm doing this, but I guess this time round she took offence.
This was how the conversation went. I made the feedback to her, which she didn't really take in. Then she told me how she stoop herself to the 'low' level of the students, and how she actually was very upset over it because, quoting her, she is doing something that she knows is wrong and unprofessional. far enough. so I asked her, how would you conduct a lesson, given the same topic. and she gave me a description of how she would do it. It is a good paedology - lots of thinking involved. however, this method alone doesn't suit all classes. so I suggested to her that she could tweak the plan a bit to suit the needs of different classes. once again, it did not get in.
I don't know how the conversation went on, but the next thing we talked about was her asking me to teach the class, which of course I rejected. She said she wanted to observe my teaching and learn from me. I'm not sure if that is a dig on me and my lack of experience. Whichever the case, I told her that I won't; I would rather spend the remaining time helping the class adapt to her teaching, because after all she's the one who's going to see her through the year. And she didn't get it, either. So I practically wasted my half an hour talking to her. Fine. But what disappointed me was that she went to complain about me to another teacher, saying things like 'I did not offend him, why did he have to do this.' and so on. I told the same teacher that it is ironic that she is complaining about how she doesn't like it when other teachers and students say 'lies' behind her back, when she's doing the exact same thing to me. So much for double standards.
Sadly, It is this kind of teachers that make me rethink about teaching as a career. I guess the real world isn't as rosy as it seems; there are so many complications, so many issues. Like what most of the other teachers think, I believe that students should not be discouraged, or worse, be made to give up a certain subject because of a teacher. They should be independent learners, and try their best to not give up on the subject. And yet this shows the power of a teacher - he can make or break a subject. So I am telling the class, and will continue to tell them not to give up - with the correct attitude nothing is too difficult. Hopefully they will understand the picture one day. Sigh.